AS HE scoured the black sand and bleak rock ledges of Bethells Beach looking for Sonny Fai, Warriors centre Brent Tate recalled "just staring into the blue water waiting for him to swim up, even though you knew he wasn't going to".
Fai, the promising 20-year-old who is presumed dead after disappearing in the treacherous waters off the west Auckland beach on Sunday evening after saving his brother from a rip, failed to swim up yesterday, and for the second day in succession he could not be located. The significance of his disappearance has begun to emerge.
Warriors captain Steve Price broke down as he spoke about the search for Fai, which will continue today, while Tate described it as "surreal".
"I know his family still haven't lost hope, and I guess in some way a lot of the boys feel that way as well, just hanging onto something … but I don't know, it's tough for everyone," Tate said. "I'm just like the rest of the boys, in a bit of denial. I don't know if it's really sunk in. I know his family is deeply religious, and they're still praying he's going to walk through the door. It's so surreal - like everyone else, we expect to see him there [at training]."
The Warriors returned to the training paddock for brief field and gym sessions yesterday after deciding as a group to do so following their lengthy search for Fai on Monday.
"As a team they wanted to do something," football manager Don Mann said. "They felt it was something Sonny would have wanted us to do. On the day he disappeared, Sonny was training."
Coach Ivan Cleary said the decision to train was "a bit of a distraction" for his players.
"They probably draw strength from each other when they're here … they seem to be holding up OK but it's just hard to know when shock stops and when it really sinks in," he said.
"There's nothing in the manual to help you here."
The Warriors will again charter a helicopter to aid the continued search by authorities, and the club has also donated money to Fai's family, and promised counselling for them. The club is expected to start counselling players today.
Even the strongest have suffered, as Price showed yesterday. While refusing to concede Fai had been lost, speaking about the Junior Kiwi representative in the present tense, he broke down when asked about the effect his disappearance had on him.
Far more certain were the plaudits for Fai's ability, with former Warriors coach Tony Kemp, who along with Daniel Anderson brought the player to the club, likening him to Sonny Bill Williams.
"It's just an absolute tragedy, what's happened," Kemp said. "I think we would have seen the best of him over the next few years. As New Zealand selectors we even spoke about him making the World Cup last year. He had all his best football ahead of him."
Tate added: "The sad thing is, when something like this happens, those terms get thrown around really loosely, but with Sonny it was fair. He was a hell of a player, and he'd only just scratched the surface of what he was capable of. The way he dominated the [under-]20s, it was a man against boys out there. The other thing that impressed me was that he was a likeable kid. No one had a bad word to say about him. He was a lovely, respectful, beautiful kid."